Ah Beng's English :

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  Ah Beng&#39;s English : <br> (Act 1) <br> Ah Beng calls the telephone operator: <br> Ah Beng: &quot;Could you please tell me the time difference between <br> Singapore <br> and New York?&quot; <br> Operator: &quot;Just a minute...&quot; <br> Ah Beng: &quot;Thank you.&quot; <br> Ah Beng got his answer and cut off the line. <br>  <br>

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  (Act 2) <br> At a bar in New York, the man sat next to Ah Beng told the <br> bartender, <br> &quot;JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE.&quot; <br> and his companion said, &quot;JACK DANIELS, SINGLE.&quot; <br> The bartender turned to Ah Beng and asked, &quot;AND YOU, SIR?&quot; <br> Ah Beng replied: &quot;Tan Ah Beng, MARRIED.&quot; <br>

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  (Act 3) <br> After completing a jigsaw puzzle he&#39;d been working on for quite <br> sometime, <br> Ah Beng proudly shows off the finished puzzle to a friend. <br> &quot;It took me only 5 MONTHS to do it,&quot; Ah Beng said. <br> &quot;FIVE MONTHS? Why did you take so long.&quot; the friend asked. <br> Ah Beng replied, &quot;No, it is not long at all, look at the box, it <br> says it is <br> for 4 to 7 years&quot;. <br>

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  (Act 4) <br> Ah Beng had just bought a new computer and was using it when he <br> encountered <br> some problems. After a few attempts, he decided to use the &#39;Help&#39; <br> command. <br> Soon after, he became very irritated and called the computer shop <br> for <br> support. <br> Ah Beng : I pressed the &#39;F1&#39; key for help... but it&#39;s been over half <br> an <br> hour & still nobody has come to help me....&quot; <br>

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  (Act 5) <br> Ah Beng with two red ears went to his doctor. <br> The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered, <br> &quot; I was <br> ironing a shirt and the phone ring lor- but instead of picking up <br> the <br> phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear. <br> So Kena lor&#33;&quot; <br> &quot;Oh Dear&#33;&quot; the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. &quot;But, what happened to <br> the <br> other ear?&quot; <br> Ah Beng: &quot;That stupid fellow called back again loh&#33;&quot; <br>

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  (Act 6) <br> Why did Ah Beng go to a movie with his 18 friends? <br> Because according to the advertisement, below 18 is not allowed to  <br> go in. <br>