<br>ROMANCE MATHEMATICS <br><br>Smart man + smart woman = romance <br><br>Smart man + dumb woman = affair <br><br>Dumb man + smart woman = marriage <br><br>Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy <br><br>OFFICE ARITHMETIC <br><br>Smart boss + smart employee = profit <br><br>Smart boss + dumb employee = production <br><br>Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion <br><br>Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime <br><br>SHOPPING MATH <br><br>A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. <br><br>A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need. <br><br>GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS <br><br>A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. <br><br>A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. <br><br>A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. <br><br>A successful woman is one who can find such a man. <br><br>HAPPINESS <br><br>To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him <br>a little. <br><br>To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to <br>understand her at all. <br><br>LONGEVITY <br><br>Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a <br>lot more willing to die. <br><br>ROPENSITY TO CHANGE <br><br>A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. <br><br>A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. |