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Heart-stopping, knee-weakening, "when-is-he-going-to-call" kind of love wanes in about 18 to 24 months, but the kind that comes in dollars and cents lasts a lifetime.
At least according to a new book, "Smart Girls Marry Money: How Women Have Been Duped into the Romantic Dream -- and How They're Paying for It."
The book confirms what mothers have been telling their daughters for generations: "Girls are told at their mother's knee: "It's just as easy to love a rich man as a poor man." Or, "No Romance without Finance." And, "Marry the one you can live with, not the one you can't live without."
Many women would agree that one good man in the boardroom is better than two in the bedroom.
Such was the case with Ginger Borgella, a 29-year-old Maryland therapist who writes the blog, "Girls Just Want To Have Funds."
"How a man treats his finances -- if he is not willing to honor his debts and obligations -- is an indicator of how he will treat you in the marriage," she told ABCNews.com.
"I want a man who is financially savvy," said Borgella, who asked to see her prospective husband's credit report.
That report wasn't perfect, but the couple made a mutual plan to establish financial security and have now been married since 2006 and own their own house.
"I don't want to be broke," said Borgella. "I'm not Paris Hilton, but I lead a comfortable life."
"Smart Girls Marry Money" is a satirical self-help guide is written by two middle-aged professionals scarred by their first marriages.
They aim their advice squarely at nubile girls who have falsely equated romantic love with happiness.
Why are girls are encouraged to court the man with the "big blue eyes" rather than the one with the "big green bankroll?" they ask.
Both authors -- Los Angeles mothers Daniela Drake and Elizabeth Ford -- say they "married for love, but reaped the consequences."
Drake is a primary care doctor with an MBA and Ford (divorced from the son of actor Harrison Ford) is an Emmy-winning television producer.
那种“我的那个他怎么还不打电话来”,心跳停止,腿脚打软类的女孩,过不了一二年就会消失,然而为了钱的那种却要伴随一生。
最近出版了一本新书,名为《聪明的女孩要嫁钱:女孩如何被浪漫梦想迷了眼-- 代价几何》。
这本书证实,母亲会代代相传,与女儿促膝而谈,面授机宜:“嫁富嫁穷都是嫁”,“没了票子丢了面子。”,“嫁汉过日,没钱莫娶。”
许多女子也认为,出得了厅堂的男人,总比只能呆在卧房里的男人强。
以博杰娜为例,她是一名29岁的马里兰州治疗师,在博客中她这样写道,“女孩就是要有钱。”
“一个男人是如何对待他的财务的,也是如何对待他的婚姻的——他如何不想兑现他的债务和义务——说明他也不会兑现他的家庭与婚姻,”她接受ABCNews.com对她的采访时说。
“我想嫁一个有经营头脑的男人,” 博杰娜说,对于她要嫁的未来丈夫,信用报告是一定要查的。
虽然信用报告并不完美,但夫妇双方还是做了一个确保收支安全的计划,从2006年俩人结婚到现在,他们已拥有了一套自己的住房。
“我不希望身无分文,”博杰娜说。“我虽不是帕里斯·希尔顿,但我想过上舒适的生活。”
“精明的女孩要嫁钱”是一个自助性的讽刺指南,作者是两位中年职业女性,她都在第一次婚姻中受过伤害。
其目的是如实地建议就要结婚的女孩,不要错误地认为,浪漫的爱情就是幸福。
这就是为啥要鼓励女孩,审查男人时要“瞪大眼睛”,而不只问“你有多少钱?”
两位作者——洛杉矶已为人母的达妮埃拉·德雷克和伊丽莎白·福特——说,她们“虽为爱而结婚,但也要收获婚姻的成果。”
德雷克是一位拥有工商管理硕士学位的初级保健医生,福特(与演员哈里逊·福特的儿子离过婚)是一位艾美奖获奖电视制片人。 |
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